WTF?! // 31 Days of Halloween — Day 8 (Piranha 3D)

Happy 31 days of Halloween! 

This year, we’re celebrating with a different movie pick each day that made me audibly gasp, “WHAT THE FUCK?!

It’s the weekend and the 8th day of our Halloween WTF movie picks. I’m keeping up the trend of fun and silly with 2010’s Piranha 3D. This movie is ape-shit bananas. Do you really need to know the plot of a film when its entire existence is to be watched purely for the nudity? It’s probably the boobiest movie I’ve ever seen.

It surprisingly has a solid cast. However, it feels like Elisabeth Shue, Richard Dreyfuss, Christopher Lloyd, Jerry O’Connell, Adam Scott, and Ving Rhames are all in different movies. That’s probably because some of them never stepped foot on set with each other. 

There’s an underwater nude ballet, a strange Jaws whirlpool scene, and a 13-minute gore fest in the waters with countless topless women. It’s definitely not taking itself seriously. The blood and gore are 100% the highlight of the film. 1,112 boats were used in Lake Havasu to create the spring break piranha massacre scene, along with 75,000 gallons of fake blood a day!

But the pièce de résistance is the piranha attack on good old friend, Jerry O’Connell, who plays Derrick. He is easily the most punchable asshole and he’s comically eaten up from the waist down. Still, he seems to only be concerned with his genitals. It was funny enough, but then we get a close-up of his missing penis in the water, quickly torn apart by piranhas. Even I closed my legs for this scene. What the fuck, and thank you for going there.

"Piranha 3D" (2010) Dimension Films